Save Me

It's been a while since I blogged, I know, I know, my fault. I've been going crazy over break with everything I have to do between family stuff and my own drama and I haven't written as much as I should have. I'm working on it. It'll be ready by week 2, I know, because I make myself meet those deadlines. I'm still just focusing on cranking out the pages and reworking stuff later. What matters right now is that a draft gets done.

Ugh.

And while I'm not totally feeling this project right now, I just had a great screenwriting experience. I was asked to give advice on and then rewrite a film senior project script. I had three days to do it, and it seems to have turned out well. It was probably the biggest moment when I felt like a writer, that this is what I do. Writing the game simulation script was cool and I actually got paid, don't get me wrong, but reworking a story and putting someone's ideas on paper for them when they can't do it themselves is very rewarding. I felt wanted. I felt like what I did mattered. It needed to be done. It's crisis mode. It's going to be filmed. I know that within a relatively short amount of time, I can say "Yeah, see that? I helped write that."

At first, I did it because my friends asked me to and I wanted to do whatever I could to help them. But I should be thanking them instead, because this opportunity has shown me again how much I love what I do, even if stuff feels like crap from time to time. So Aly, if you're reading this, thank you! And I'll thank you in person, too.

Also going on at the moment: I just reached a critical moment in a certain chapter of my life. For a bit, life actually felt like a movie. I was half expecting to hear the soundtrack playing in the background. I thought -- and sincerely hoped -- that I had entered the last 10 pages in which I would have to get in a cab which would drive too slow so I'd have to get out and run and reach my destination before the stroke of midnight and all would be well. Instead, of course, I have just entered Act Three in which something horrible has happened and then it all has to magically get better before the credits roll. Yes, I'm in "martyr" mode, at my lowest point.

So in these final pages, final terms, final moments that we know that we'll have together...something good better happen. Or I'm going to be very angry. And lose faith in a lot of things. But you know, no biggie.