How It Ends

Since I'm taking the Writing the Personal Essay class which is essentially memoir writing, I've had to read examples of personal essays and excerpts of memoirs. One of the best things I have read so far is something that is not on our list. It's called Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure. Inspired by the legend of Hemingway's "For sale: baby shoes, never worn," this book contains hundreds of peoples' lives compressed into six words. They range from Stephen Colbert's "Well, I thought it was funny." to a nine-year-old girl's "Cursed with cancer. Blessed with friends." One of my favorites is "Cheese is the essence of life."

I enjoyed reading these, trying to imagine exactly why these people chose those specific six words to summarize their lives. Some obviously put a lot of thought into it, and others didn't seem to as much. I got ideas for stories and movies from these half sentences. This collection was a brilliant idea. For a while, I made myself write at least one six-word memoir per day, detailing something that had happened or that I thought during the course of the day. For example, the first time I had to answer phones at the Film Office, I summarized the experience as such: "Film Office. Who's this? Please hold." And when it seemed like it was going great, I wrote "This isn't so bad after all!" and then when I fucked up royally: "Shit shit shit shit shit shit."

But then I started to think of how I would summarize my life so far in a six-word memoir. How could I do such a thing? How could I consolidate 21 years into six words? Obviously other people had done it with far more years to consider, but what would I say? Was there an exact moment that defined my life, like the person who wrote, "I fell in love with Charlie"? Or could I sum it up in something silly, like "Happiness is a warm salami sandwich"?

I thought about all the different things I say and do in my life, how I never feel like or seem to be one thing. I'll do something that people expect of me, and then I'll throw them for a loop with something else...but the thing is, it's still me, and they all still realize that. I don't turn into a different person when I change out of my jeans that I have drawn all over and into a satiny cocktail dress. Someone who's only seen me in one of those outfits might not have expected the other, but once they've seen it, they expect anything and everything. And that's when it hit me.

I wouldn't want to sum up my life right now as only accounting for the past 21 years. I want to include past, present and the future. I want something that will last. I want something that will keep.

"One day, I'll really surprise you."

And you're not gonna be ready for it.

Devil's Dance Floor

BAM!

It's just after 3 and it's in!

I MEET DEADLINES!

There is soooooooooo much I need to fix. Like I've said before, I've focused on getting pages out and trying to incorporate certain new ideas into them, but I am looking forward to (1) not thinking about the script for a day, and (2) going back and completely ripping it to shreds to make it something much better.

I've only just realized that my lead is similar to a character I recently saw somewhere else. So what I'm going to do is watch this other character and see how he's been written and how the things in his life are played out. No, I'm not stealing - I want to see what made him successful as a character and how I can apply that to mine.

Oh man. This is amazing. I know the work has only just begun, but now that one -- albeit in desperate need of help -- first draft is done, I feel much better. So much better. It's in. It's done. On time. It's no masterpiece, but there it is. Ha. Done. On time. Boo yah.

Don't rain on my parade, I'm doing my victory dance.

I'll Be OK

It used to be that I'd always write scenes that were way too long and unnecessary. I always had to cut things down by a lot. Now, I feel like I'm getting control of that and getting everything out in scenes much quicker and in a more concise manner. Which means that my scenes are really short. And that means they take up less pages. Which means I need to write MORE scenes to fill the pages. Which really sucks. What also sucks is how little space action takes up on a page. So a moment that might actually last a whole 30 seconds in film isn't actually taking up half a page, but two sentences. So I could write five pages that actually take fifteen minutes, but I'll still be ten pages short. God damn it.

And even though I'm working on this and all, I am much more interested in the real-life drama around me than I am in fake drama on the page. That's another thing that's changing - usually, I'm so interested in my characters and what they're doing and these made up stories that I really don't care what's going on outside the screen. Now? Nope. Real things are ACTUALLY interesting and compelling. And I would much rather go live my own adventure than write one for an imaginary person.

I feel incredibly motivated and alive, and at the same time, ridiculously pissed off and angry at everything. I want all you people to talk to me, and then I want you to leave me alone.

"Everybody's crazy except you and me, and I'm not so sure about you."

Save Me

It's been a while since I blogged, I know, I know, my fault. I've been going crazy over break with everything I have to do between family stuff and my own drama and I haven't written as much as I should have. I'm working on it. It'll be ready by week 2, I know, because I make myself meet those deadlines. I'm still just focusing on cranking out the pages and reworking stuff later. What matters right now is that a draft gets done.

Ugh.

And while I'm not totally feeling this project right now, I just had a great screenwriting experience. I was asked to give advice on and then rewrite a film senior project script. I had three days to do it, and it seems to have turned out well. It was probably the biggest moment when I felt like a writer, that this is what I do. Writing the game simulation script was cool and I actually got paid, don't get me wrong, but reworking a story and putting someone's ideas on paper for them when they can't do it themselves is very rewarding. I felt wanted. I felt like what I did mattered. It needed to be done. It's crisis mode. It's going to be filmed. I know that within a relatively short amount of time, I can say "Yeah, see that? I helped write that."

At first, I did it because my friends asked me to and I wanted to do whatever I could to help them. But I should be thanking them instead, because this opportunity has shown me again how much I love what I do, even if stuff feels like crap from time to time. So Aly, if you're reading this, thank you! And I'll thank you in person, too.

Also going on at the moment: I just reached a critical moment in a certain chapter of my life. For a bit, life actually felt like a movie. I was half expecting to hear the soundtrack playing in the background. I thought -- and sincerely hoped -- that I had entered the last 10 pages in which I would have to get in a cab which would drive too slow so I'd have to get out and run and reach my destination before the stroke of midnight and all would be well. Instead, of course, I have just entered Act Three in which something horrible has happened and then it all has to magically get better before the credits roll. Yes, I'm in "martyr" mode, at my lowest point.

So in these final pages, final terms, final moments that we know that we'll have together...something good better happen. Or I'm going to be very angry. And lose faith in a lot of things. But you know, no biggie.

Nightmare Before Christmas

Last night, I dreamed that I received an F minus on my latest script submission, and the biggest reason for a grade that does not even exist was "Eh. It's okay."

Matt, it wouldn't surprise me if you actually sent me an F minus just to freak me out. So I'm onto you.

Girl Meets Script

I am so relieved that this term is almost over, but the work has just begun. I have to remember to pace myself on finishing this script and make sure it's done, hopefully before the end of week 2 - I mean, it'll be done by that Friday, but my goal is before. We'll see how that goes. I reached the midpoint of my script, but it's a few pages short - 45 instead of the 50 I wanted. I'm really just starting to figure out some of what the movie is about and where it's going. I feel like it's starting to come more into its own than it was in the beginning, but I will have a lot of editing and revising to do. Really, I'm just trying to plow through and get a draft finished, even if I'm not totally loving everything that's going on. Having a loose full draft to work with is much better than having three perfect scenes and nothing else. I hope more of the story comes to me to add to the beginning so I can reach the length I want. Actually, in my efforts to "fill pages," I feel like I came up with a couple good things that I didn't think of before, like a young family for my main character to compare to his own life. We'll see how break and the subsequent two weeks go. Here's hoping they're good.

On another note, I'm watching an old episode of Boy Meets World, and I am loving this one scene where Cory is showing a girl how to order at this dive place called Chubbie's. It's so South Philly accurate. Cory says, "Okay listen, [Chubbie]’s gonna turn around and raise one eyebrow. He will not speak. You’ll have a two second window to order. You say 'Turkey Chubbie.' He’ll wipe his nose. Then you say 'With everything.' And he’s gonna look at you real hard like he’s making a decision about you. if he asks what you want to drink, you’re in, you’re set for life."

Hooray Philly accuracy in a show that once referred to the Franklin Institute as "The Franklin Museum of Science."

A Sailor's Christmas

In my script, the main characters go to a restaurant called Lor-e-Lei in Islamorada. This is that restaurant.


This first picture is the bar back in the day before hurricane Wilma nearly destroyed everything. The bar had to be redone and raised up a few more feet. The indoor restaurant flooded completely and was torn down. Last time I checked, they were planning on building little yacht club or something there. I'm hoping the atmosphere stays the same, because the last thing this place needs is more snooty yachtsmen parading by. The indoor restaurant was the nicest part of the whole thing, but not so obnoxious. Just outside that room was an outdoor deck that had an in -between atmosphere.



The bar was and is the most relaxed and the most fun, surrounded by tables and chairs and a small stage. Nightlife at Lor-e-Lei is great, but one of my fondest memories is being there in the middle of winter, sitting at the bar, drinking hot chocolate and eating a bagel while a pelican eyes the food from its perch nearby.

This is the bar now:


A little bit nicer, a tad higher. I really miss the giant "BAR" sign, as does everyone else who goes there. That sign was a real part of the place, and now it's gone. The atmosphere is similar, but part of it disappeared along with that sign. I guess if there's going to be a yacht club, there has to be a mild amount of dignity at the place. But apparently bare breasted mermaids everywhere are still okay. And that's Lor-e-Lei.


And this is the obnoxiously huge mermaid sign that sits by the side of the road to bring you in: